texts from last night

[stillarhino]

you know the drill.

Comments

Trahearne | Guild Wars 2

[pactmarshal]

1) I gave myself a pep talk in the archive bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.

2) Good morning beautiful! Want to steal a cat this weekend?

3) I am the drunkest tree in the tree.

4) The Pale Tree knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so she made me a workaholic to ensure I'd never romance them.

5) dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont give me antmore

6) Or text him!

2

[grandduchess_anya]

I have never stolen a cat in ever? That plan sounds really, um, intriguing.

[pactmarshal]

Neither have I. But are you interested?

[grandduchess_anya]

Oh, it is high alright, very high indeed.

[pactmarshal]

Good. I think it's time I adopted Eustace's cat. Without his permission.

[grandduchess_anya]

Ah, that is very sneaky of you. Will he get mad at us for doing that though?

[pactmarshal]

Of course. But he has too many dogs to notice.

[grandduchess_anya]

Well in any case, maybe we can set up it at any moment now. As someone who has pulled plenty of pranks as a kid, I’m more than happy to help.

[pactmarshal]

Consider it done. He will be none the wiser.

1

[hearthwarming]

What?? Are you okay? Do you need help?

[pactmarshal]

Yes. No.









No. Yes. I have been writing this proposal for a week now. I start to feel sick whenever I think about it.

[hearthwarming]

[ wait. ]

A proposal? To who???

[pactmarshal]

To the owls minding historical fiction in the Tree of Stories. They have a splendid collection of tales on Orr, and I was hoping to house them in the archives instead, considering Orrian history was my specialty. For some reason, I'm quite nervous about them saying no.



[ WHAT KIND OF PROPOSAL WERE YOU THINKING, ORI ]

[hearthwarming]

[ THE KIND THAT GETS TRAHEARNE LAID, WHICH HE NEEDS MUCH MORE THAN A BUNCH OF OWL BOOKS ]

Oh. That kind of proposal.

[pactmarshal]

[ PLEASE DON'T GET YOUR HOPES UP. ]

Yes! It's quite exciting, all things aside, and it will be an excellent addition to the space.





You sound disappointed.

[hearthwarming]

No, I'm definitely happy that you'll get to exchange books or whatever...

[ or whatever ]

I thought maybe you were going to propose to somebody out of the nowhere, so I was shocked!

4

[disdelusioned]

Meanwhile, the god of my land has spent an awful amount of time and energy trying to get me to "loosen up" and find someone.

[And now that he has, Venti has moved on to talking about their sex life.]

Quips aside, your taste in men can't be that bad.

[pactmarshal]

It seems we have the opposite problem.

But it is quite bad, I will admit. A stranger in a cave dared him to eat a piece of toxic bacon and he did it without second thought. And I thought it was attractive.

[disdelusioned]

That we do.

[Oh. Oh dear.]

...can you explain why was that attractive to you?

[pactmarshal]

I honestly cannot. It struck me as brave, I suppose.

[disdelusioned]

"Brave" is one way of putting it.

[Diluc doesn't have much room to talk. He's seen Ori full-on commit a murder in a dream memory and still finds that kind of hot.]

I hope he survived the toxic bacon incident?

[pactmarshal]

[ Stupid. Impulsive. ]

He did. Was perfectly fine not twenty minutes later.

He almost seemed tempted to do it again.

[disdelusioned]

[Oh honey, you deserve someone smarter.]

Maybe there's merit to your theory after all...

3

[stillarhino]

hold up since when was u a tree

[pactmarshal]

Since my mother was a tree


Beat have you never noticed